What to Create. How does an artist decide.

I have been in a bit of a quandary lately over what to paint next, no not these little paintings, but bigger paintings 1/2 sheets to full size sheets.

I just finished a series. I decided I wanted to start another series or so I thought. The problem is: I cannot for the life of me get the second painting started. This tells me maybe I really don't want to make it into a series. The series was about ritual and how we have always use ritual to connect us to one another and to our past. The first piece was an abstract and it was painted very dark and had lots of color. I like it and it is hanging in a show now.

With the fall art season breathing down my neck, the pressure to paint something which will be accepted into these shows and hopefully win has got me confused. You see, usually I get into the show, but I' m always the bride's maid rarely the bride. I think its my approach. I don't have a strategy.

I don't look up the judge's credentials to see which way their art leans or even what their medium is. I don't try to paint what the judge paints. For years I didn't enter art shows because I didn't want to be influenced by awards. I stayed away from organizations and groups. I have always believed the work speaks for its self. Problem is: If no one see the work, it has no voice. Now I've been told I should always keep my work out there in circulation, be part of an artist community and recognition will come in time. But of course, in entering these shows, I have done everything wrong. Once, I submitted nudes in a show where I ( no lie) over heard the judge say, " I guess I'll have to pick the obligatory nude". Another time I submitted a very detailed still life of glass and fruit, when the judge (who was a sculptorby the way) selected a charcoal of a nude I thought maybe I should have known. Then, I painted abstracts and all the awards went to still life paintings, can you believe it? The worse thing was that these shows were all back to back too.

That brings us to this point in time. This last show allowed each artist three pieces, I submitted a koi which was very good, a landscape which was done in my unique style and an abstract. I figured I almost had everything covered, sure I didn't have a nude or a still life but I had most of the bases covered. To my surprise and happiness, they all get in. But you guessed it, none are chosen for an award and I am still confused. Of course in looking at the winners which all of us do, we ask ourselves" is this work more unique, better executed, than mine? We usually say no not really. You know and I know that all judging is subjective and what one judge chooses and another judge chooses (in the same show) would be totally different. Still it would be nice to win more often.

Now you can see, why I hardly know what to paint. I have let this show thing get in the way of my personal search.

This time, I have decided to paint something that is complex without to much detail, something that is well designed and has my own personal style, something painterly.
I'll let you know how it goes. I have about a month.